Ask the Brain! :)

In the News - 2 Dec: Barry Bonds Mitt Romney Rupert Murdoch Santa Claus Pearl Harbor

Topic: Internet Information Server

Vital Stats

The Brain has inferred the following facts from reading text collected on the topic:

Favorite website(s):

E*TRADE

Favorite possession(s):

Linux box, Windows computer, Apple Computer

Dream job(s):

Webmaster

Favorite book(s):

"Maximum Internet Security: A Hackers Guide" by Net Sams
"Beginning Visual Basic 6" by Peter Wright

Favorite food(s):

Interest(s):

Computers

Favorite computer game(s):

Hacking, Counter Strike, Quake

Favorite online activity(s):

Chatting on ICQ, Finding warez, Downloading MP3's

Ultimate fantasy(s):

Finding genuinely free porn on the internet

Membership(s):

Free Software Foundation

Favorite quote(s):

"A rolling stone gathers no moss"
"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home." - Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977
"There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult." - C. A. R. Hoare

Expert Talk

The Brain has selected interesting relevant sentences from the web. It automatically assigned them to some of our fictitious experts based on their personalities.

Steve Riggins,
Software Deveoper

Monitoring Internet servers means that PageSentry executes server tests at user-defined intervals.
Proxy servers are also constructs that allow direct Internet access from behind a firewall.
Internet tools are also included that allow connectivity to servers around the world.

Mike Enlow,
Internet Marketer

An Internet domain is required to have two name servers which will answer DNS requests for the domain.
Name servers act as directories and tell other internet users where the web space associated with a domain name is precisely located on the Internet.
It is the servers that tell users on the internet what server to go to when they type in your URL in their browsers.

Dave Simons,
Internet Entrepeneur

Both servers are connected directly to the Internet at fractional T-1 speeds ensuring quick access for participants and organizations who are updating their resources stored on the NT server.
These servers are attached directly to the Internet's backbone providing unsurpassed reliability in connectivity and resulting in virtually unlimited bandwidth on demand.
Both servers are located in a secured area at DPT, and are accessed via a firewall and a T1 connection to a major Internet Service Provider.

Dan Toomey,
Computer Salesman

Both internet servers have been substantially upgraded with extra memory and Xeon processors and the mail servers now actively check for spammers AND virus email if the customer has signed up for that service with us.
Servers are top of the line Pentium II based with the ability to access the internet at the fastest speeds available.
These servers are NOT directly connected to the internet, which means that your private information is available only to Pay Pal authorized computers.

User Talk

Comments from our users:

Got a question? Got an answer? Let's hear it!

Pass this on!

Share the fun! Pass this on!

This is a satirical computer-generated website. By using this site, you agree to abide by our terms and conditions.