Ask the Brain! :)

In the News - 23 Nov: Barry Bonds Mitt Romney Rupert Murdoch Santa Claus Pearl Harbor

Topic: Physician and Sports Medicine

Vital Stats

The Brain has inferred the following facts from reading text collected on the topic:

Good point(s):

Patient

People talk about their ..:

Childhood trauma

Personality:

Suicidal

Currently has on their coffee table:

Men's Health magazine

Dream job(s):

Nurse

Favorite TV show(s):

Favorite body part(s):

Heart, Hair, Breasts

Favorite book(s):

"What Every Girl Should Know" by Margaret Sanger
The Common Sense Book of Baby and Child Care - Dr. Benjamin Spock

Favorite sport(s):

Running, Volleyball

Medical note(s):

Undergoing therapy, Has cancer, Heart attack imminent

Worst habit(s):

Smoking

Favorite quote(s):

"Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something." - last words of Pancho Villa (1877-1923)
"I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it."
"A watched pot never boils"

Expert Talk

The Brain has selected interesting relevant sentences from the web. It automatically assigned them to some of our fictitious experts based on their personalities.

Brian Mengel,
Civil Servant

Sports medicine and physicians will be on staff at the tournament facility to take care of any medical problems that may occur.
The Sports Medicine Institute and its physicians have an extensive involvement in sports medicine in the Central Florida community.

John Fielding,
CEO

Team physicians are scheduled to be in the athletic training room two days a week and appointments can be made at other times by the sports medicine staff.

Albert Graham,
Backyard Pool Drainer

Sport-medicine physicians suggest using ice to reduce the swelling by restricting blood -flow immediately following an injury such as a muscle tear or sprain.
Our sports medicine physicians diagnose and treat sports-related injuries.
In sports medicine, physicians advise athletes to drink water.

Zhang Xian Qian,
Ex-Olympic Swimmer

The Sports Medicine Institute is also proud to serve as Team Physicians for the Central Florida Kraze soccer team.
Sports Medicine Physicians specialize in the non-operative medical treatment of musculoskeletal sports conditions.

Adam Findley,
Professional Motivator

Our physicians are fellowship trained in both spine surgery and sports medicine.

Tony Howell,
Skateboarder

As sports medicine physicians, we often order chest x-rays to check for broken ribs.

Arthur Dawkins,
Astro-physicist

The physicians of Sports Medicine Institute serve as team physicians at numerous high schools.

User Talk

Comments from our users:

Got a question? Got an answer? Let's hear it!

Pass this on!

Your friends really should know a little more about Physician and Sports Medicine, don't you think?

This is a satirical computer-generated website. By using this site, you agree to abide by our terms and conditions.